Is it worth it?

Category: Dating and Relationships

Post 1 by fantabulous tigger (Generic Zoner) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 14:28:53

Ok I'm currently dating someone who is in another state all the way accross the country. Sometimes I miss him so much that it kills me. know good things come to those who wait, but is the pain really worth it?

Post 2 by CrazedMidget (Sweet fantacy's really do come in small packages!) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 14:31:45

I believe it is, cause I'm going through the same situation.
I cry sometimes cause I know when I need my bf, I can only call him or write him.
I do feel that as long as you're commited, anything can happen.
Good luck on the relationship,
Jess

Post 3 by Morgan_Lynn (Account disabled) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 16:43:36

I agree Jess...

I'm in the same situation kind of..

I'm in California, and my BF is in Pennsylvania, we have plans to mete in the summer, and both of us are very commited..So....Agreeing with Jess, yes;if you love the person, and are willing to stick it out, and have faith and trust, it is worth it and it will work out..

Hope everything works out for you, and hope my advice helpeds.

<3
Morgan

Post 4 by cumbiambera2005 (i just keep on posting!) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 17:02:32

I used to know a couple that the girl lived in New York, and the guy in Calli, and they were extrememly close, ended up getting engaged too! i think they may even be married now, not sure though! So yes, it can work! Good luck :)
Ashley

Post 5 by maroon five (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 17:35:56

i think if you and your bf are commited to each other, and have plans to meet if you haven't already, then it is worth it. having him in the same country makes it a little bit easier, cause some people date out of their country, and that makes it real hard. my ex was from England and i am in Australia, and with a distence like that, the both of you have to have total trust in each other, and hope that neither of you cheat or anything like that. good luck with what ever you decide to do.

Post 6 by Click_Clash (No Average Angel) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 17:55:06

If the two of you care about each other, you can overcome the distance problem. And it will absolutely be worth it. Good luck. Smile

Becky

Post 7 by bozmagic (The rottie's your best friend if you want him/her to be, lol.) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 18:04:25

Agree whole heartedly with the last post. Me and my bf are both in the UK. He's in North Lincolnshire, I'm nearly all the way across the country from him in Surrey, 216 miles away. I'm missing him like absolute hell, every spare minute I have, I seem to be falling apart at the seems emotionally unless I see he's online on MSN or Skype, thank the lord for good old Skype. but this pain, this meltdown I think is well and truly worth it till I hopefully go up there and see him again as soon as possible, plus my mum's giving me a whole load of grief about flat hunting and later life bridges we'll have to cross if this relationship does indeed work out as me and Kris think it will, so for the last 6 days or so, it's been hard, almost too hard for me to cope, but so long as I see him there on Messenger and Skype, I can take anything anyone throws at me.

Jen.

Post 8 by Skyla (move over school!) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 18:49:32

I don't think that managing a long-distance relationship is necessarily all about love and commitment. Certainly those things are important, but I honestly don't believe that long distance relationships are worth pursuing unless there is a foreseeable end to the distance. Personally, I wouldn't be able to date someone who lived far away, unless I knew with certainty that distance wouldn't be an issue in the relatively near future. Having dated both long-distance and locally, I have to say that local relationships are more fulfilling. Again, this is just my opinion. I know how much it hurts to miss someone though, so I hope for your sake that the distance can be eliminated asap.

Post 9 by Emerald-Hourglass (Account disabled) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 19:21:49

i'm on the fence, being in long distance and local, obviously local is a lot easier. yeah if your committed and love each other it could deffinitly work, but, that's not always enough unfortunatly

Post 10 by Sword of Sapphire (Whether you agree with my opinion or not, you're still gonna read it!) on Saturday, 10-Jan-2009 22:43:19

I think that a long distance relationship is totally worth it, especially if you plan on meeting up. But I must agree with Janelle, having a local relationship is easier.

Post 11 by bman1983 (Newborn Zoner) on Monday, 12-Jan-2009 4:42:42

My girlfriend is in sweeden, and i'm in the u s, we've seen each other once, and i have plans to return in a week. so yes, if there is an end to the distance, it certainly can work.

Post 12 by margorp (I've got the gold prolific poster award, now is there a gold cup for me?) on Monday, 12-Jan-2009 21:25:56

I personally agree with skyla. However, anything's possible.

Post 13 by Ok Sure (This site is so "educational") on Monday, 12-Jan-2009 22:04:33

Answering the question of whether your long distance relationship is worth it is very difficult. The person you are having this relationship with, must be very special to you, and of course, you will think of them as being worth it.

Rather, think of where you see yourself with this person in the near future. Being in love and maintaining a 5 year old long distance relationship is nearly impossible for most people, so if you are planning on being together, it should be not so long from now.

How often do you plan to see each other, and will these visits become a financial Burdon to you both?

Are you both willing to relocate in order to continue this relationship?

If so, then when do you plan to do so?

Is this someone you plan to be with for a long time, because if it is not, then there is little motivation for you or your significant other to start preparing for a future together.

In other words, long distance relationships are not worth it unless they will eventually become local.

Post 14 by Eponine (If you find a rare Gem, hold it tightly!) on Friday, 16-Jan-2009 10:24:44

Hi,

Well, speaking from both sides, I've had local and LDR's, and I am here to say the LDR's are not easy, but the one i'm in now has proven to be a great success, and soon, the distance won't be a problem anymore. We will be married next year and the time of waiting to see each other will be at an end. We are very much in love, and are dedicated to each other and to the love we have, so the distance hasn't been much of a problem this time, even though we are in two different countries. It can work, if the true love is there, and if there are plans to change the distance factor in the near future. This process can be stressful, and costly, and it does take time, but if you truly love each other, it can work. Good luck!

Post 15 by Miss Gorgeous (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Friday, 16-Jan-2009 15:07:45

Its worth it if you know the person and have spent some time together. If you really think that this relationship is going somewhere, then go for it, but if you only see this person as a short term deal, then don't even bother. If your both willing to be faithful and both commit to spending some cash to see each other, then there shouldn't be a problem with that. Though i know some people would rather go local, if you cannot handle not seeing that person for a month or two, then just go local. Its really hard, but if you both give an effort for this to work out, then it will. Another thing, if you have future plans to move in together or move somewhere closer, then the long distance would work out. If you trust the person and you've known them for awhile before you became a couple, then I think it would work, just give time, effort, and last but not the least, both of you have to communicate effectively. Thats all. I hope it helps. Long distance relationships are not that hard, at least, you give each other lots of personal space and lots of time to think about things. Its not for everyone, so before you go through this type of relationship, make sure you can handle it.